She felt the first real squeeze of life on the day she graduated.
她第一次感到人生的迫不得已，是毕业这一天。
It wasn’t any one big thing. Friends went their own ways. Work looked messy. And she could no longer hide in the campus bubble where doing nothing still counted as doing something.
无非是朋友分离、工作繁琐，再无法躲在象牙塔里摸鱼。
She called it “emo” for lack of a better word, but under that gray mood was something closer to despair.
她说自己莫名的emo，而这灰色的情绪底下，是万念俱灰。
This graduation season, she was about to start what people politely call “adult life,” and what people privately call “being a corporate pawn.”
这毕业季里，她将开启一段称之为社畜的生活。
The dreams she held and the loose plans she made began to fall apart once real life shined on them.
此前的幻想和空泛的计划，在现实的灼射下开始幻灭。
She was twenty-three. At that age, you’re supposed to be full of energy and hope.
这天她二十三岁，骨子里本该充满能量和希望。
But standing inside the truth of her life felt like walking through ruins.
只是生活在这真相里，仿佛彷徨在一片废墟里。
Passing an old dust-covered car on the street, she felt a strange warmth toward it.
途经街头吃灰的破车时，她天真地感到一股亲切。
It was a relic from the last century—old, beaten, useless—
那是上个世纪的工业产物，老旧、破败、无能，
buried under sad gray dust, with no hint of life left.
覆盖在古老而悲哀的灰尘里，没有任何生机。
One day she lay in bed recalling the darker parts of her past. It felt like wandering through an abandoned hospital at night.
一天，她躺床上回忆幽暗的过去，宛如在深夜废弃的医院里。
She ran in fear, her back cold, stumbling the whole way.
她惊恐地奔跑，一路脊背凉飕飕，一路跌跌撞撞。
Only when she threw herself into the light of dawn, landing back on her college campus, did she catch her breath.
直到一头扎进黎明，在大学校园里落了脚，才缓过神来。
For the next three years she rose each day wrapped in the blanket of friendship, reading, writing, facing the sea.
此后的三年里的每一天，她裹着友情的毛毯起来，读书写字，面朝大海。
But spring doesn’t stay. The dark storm crept in from far away.
只是好景不长，这春天已尽，黑色的风雨从远处寸寸压来。
The storm wasn’t aimed at her. It was aimed at her whole generation.
这风雨不是冲她而来，这是时代的风雨，席卷的是一代人。
And this dumb, screwed-up life felt like a fish tied to a tree.
这滚犊子的生活，就像一条鱼绑在树上。